Thursday, July 3, 2008

Two by Misti Rainwater-Lites

You Are Disgusting Me

with your These Are Not The Tots
I Ordered So I Shall Proceed To
Desecrate Them With Chocolate Syrup
And Worcestershire Sauce And Feed
Them To My Friend Bobby's Idiot
Slobbering Stinky Butt Poodle
And Educate The Stupid Bitch Waitress
On The Fundamentals Of Fried Food
And Demand She Bring Me A Free
Platter of Onion Rings Extra Crispy
Or Risk My Damning Her To
Unemployment Hell With My
Angry Comment Card Scribble

I mean really dude
…really…
if you were standing in front of me
right now I do believe I would spit
in your fat smug hypocrisy smeared face
and tell you to stop wishing on the blue
melancholy moon and grab a fucking
life.
I would tell you the French fries at McDonald's
aren't as good as they were in 1985
but that doesn't stop me from scarfing them down
every chance I get.
I eat them without ketchup.
For me, the salt is sufficient.
I crave salt worse than any deer you ever saw.
I don't blame anybody but myself for the heartburn.
Baby, I'm a big girl now.
You won't find me crying into my Coca-Cola.

My tombstone is a comment card I carry around
like a passport since I have this wry death wish joke
and cannot afford to leave the merry hell that is
2008 America. To writ:
I don't speak that thumb suck pity potty language
but you can still knock three times on my tree house
anytime, Big Boy. There is no secret handshake.
There is a banana milkshake on your head if you
don't take your hat off when talking to me. My monkey
sees all so don't try no tricks!

#

Finally Found a Friend in This Fucking Town

i came into her warmth
from cold rain which
streaked my foundation
and blackest mascara
i expected the worst
i hoped for the best
she gave me a towel
she talked to me like
i was a spirit, shining
not a paper doll, crumpling
i loved her accent
i loved her conversation
i loved that she didn't ask
the usual questions
i loved that she could translate
my fluster
and she thought i was italian
and she thought i was beautiful
and she told me when i return
she will make me even
more beautiful
with a few strands of violet
to frame my exquisite countenance

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